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  • Hola amigos! New year new me. or probably not. Since we talk before, i mean from the previous post, i sort of made a promises (to myself) to keep posting tentang apa yang terjadi di hidup saya for the past six months. Cape juga ye ngetik pake bahasa inggris. Tapi dipostingan ini saya akan memulai dari bulan Juni, cause ya know, it's the month of my birthday and i have a lot stories on that month. So cuss...

    Juni : As you know (or you just don't, like who cares? Right?) this is the month of my birthday,
    and this is what happened.

    .....

    And that the end of my draft, hahahah i cant believe i didnt write my story for almost two years.

    Well since i don't know where to start,  i just want to explain a few big moments of my life since 2016. So apparently if u see my last post about the mahar thing that i made on may 2016 well it grows. I made almost a thousand pop up since then. Its been two years, i dont really expect that to happen, this is my daily job now, i make so much money on here, i can buy what i need because my first job doesn't pay me well. Yeah i never thought that too. I also got another job at the end of 2016 until February 2017, its a so so job but the money was good, but sadly it has to end because its not a well prepared job, the system is awful, my bos is really a nice person but he kinda suck at his job so the company has to go down.

    Since 2016 ive been dating in 2017 again with someone but ended up tragically kayak di FTV FTV, cause apparently i date a player, i mean i should see that coming, he has a lot of followers, he got a thousand dm per day, and the worst is i finally got him cheating on me with the person i know the day after his fucking birthday. we don't know that we date the same guy. It happens two weeks after i start dating him. Its not a long relationship, i dated him for solid two months. But not like any relationship that i had before, he gave me the experience that i never have. He is a sweet guy, he also romantic but he doing it too to other people. So thats what hurt me, huhuhu im not the only one apparently, poor me. But ive been doing so much great to leave that feelings behind at the beginning of 2018. I make a resolution to not to date anyone this year and thats what im doing now, i just want to see myself focusing to myself only and a little bit of my surroundings this year.

    For the past two years ive been changed so much, im pretty sure become more me than before, i was not comfortable talking about myself since i write a post here, im becoming more true about myself and it was a great and a joy feelings not to tied up with anything. Just me. And no judgement from me, cause i judge myself too much in the past. I should be more let loose about everything to see myself and my mind to grow, i don't need to be afraid to try something new and learn a new experience so yeah its been a great years since i left here.

    So thats the end of this story, im ready to see what happen in the next more years and to see myself becomings.

    A little kiss from me. Be positive and keep doing you. Bye! 💋
    Dear my future me

    Halo abrar, its me ur past, i dont know what am i doing right now, its 3 am and its been a great in the past week, ive been sleeping at night and wake up in the morning, everything is going great and placed not really perfectly at their times but well placed heheh, i know its not easy to change the habit that u have, but i know we can move slowly to change that, take ur time, set ur mind, be grateful at every moment. As right now im doing this again, im not sleeping at night, probably because i don't take my morning coffee or i overslept in the morning so i don't do much today and yeah i end up here again but u know what i don't have to feel guilty, but also i have a lot to do in the morning since i don't do much yesterday, i know its confusing, because at this very time i can get a overthinking process and we know how it end so badly, lmao i just wanted or wish we can control that, its fine to have an overthink thought but what we have to figured it out is how we control our emotions at the end, i hope my future me can figure that out.

    Im writing this letter to you bacause i end up reading chapter 3 of Note to Self by Connor Franta about how he wrote his futureself to his pastself, and then I thought, i probably could do the same be I reverse it. So yeah, despite what im doing tonight, yesterday was fun, ive been enjoying myself working with no pressure cause im finished it the day before the deadline so thats what you need to keep on doing, because u are a mess when everything is going on the edge. And also u need to keep the balance between the reality and ur god, just keep that in mind, find the balance, note that down!

    I also want u to stay focus on what u put on yourlist and please write down ur list because u will forgot every single thing on that mind. U don't have to rush everything, this is not a race, keep ur body in control. I almost lost our wallet because of that, noted that!

    Keep making a crappy content because that will improve you. Find more idea, don't stay on that zone, eat properly plase, take care of our body, dont waste ur money on things that we didn't need, and i want to see ur room get decorated next year. If u don't well i dont know hahah but plaseeeeee do that.

    Meet someone new. Ask anyone. Dont wait to anyone to ask u out, but right now im not doing that this year, so i want you to do that next year, open up with a person, find someone where u can share all the memes and that funny videos u find on the internet.

    Okay probably im about to head up to sleep because it almost 4 am right now, i probably missed so much point here, but right know thats all i need to say to you, well good night future me!

    Sincerely, ur past

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